Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Reflections on a hard day

I realized the other day why I have to run my house with a "school at home" type of schooling. Bear can be SO opposed to learning if we're not "in school time"! I was reading some really simple phonics books to them before nap one day last week, the words of which Bear could read in a heartbeat, and all she could do was say, "It's not school time! Why do I have to read? We're not in school!" So I didn't make her read, but it was frustrating to me nonetheless...sigh.Sometimes it seems like she's in a permanent bad mood. And she's not even 6 yet. It makes me sad. We started Kindergarten knowing that she would end up "ahead" just by default. Just due to the fact that we can spend as much or as little time on a subject as we need to, and that her education is "concentrated" because of one on one attention. Somewhere along the line I've gotten sidetracked, I think, and caught up in curriculum and things like that. I come here and read all the posts and everything sounds so great and I think, "I've got to try that! Or that! Or that!" And I read about other kids and think, "Well, could Bear do that? Is she up to 'par' with other kids?" and forget that all are different and that she is doing great for her. I hope she's not getting burnt out, but maybe I'm pushing too hard. I SO want her to love learning and reading that it really worries me to think that I may be burning her out already....

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